Monday, June 25, 2012. One ordinary day, like most of our homeschool days, was not glorious or victorious at all. On the contrary, I felt rather defeated at the end of the day. Oh, the times listed were only rough estimates.
7:20 am -7:40am.
Kids got into daddy and mommy's bed. Sweet snuggling and jiggling quickly turned into fighting between the boys.
7:40 am - 8:00 am.
All got up,dressed, and made beds -- after much nagging and threatening. "It only takes 5 minutes to get dressed and make your bed. Why do I have to tell you again and again?"
8:00 am - 8:50 am.
Time for breakfast. Daniel and James both like quesadilla. I use flour tortilla and simply fill them with cheese or omelet. Daniel eagerly offered to help with cooking. "Sure, don't put in too much cheese!" It did speed things up with one extra pair of hands.
8:50 am - 9:15 am.
Teeth were brushed and faces were washed, without much nagging, which did not happen everyday. Daniel did his chore of watering our vegetable garden after being reminded a couple of times. I have to admit that he has been doing this chore quite well recently. Maybe it's because squirting water is sort of fun to him?
9:15 am.
"Daniel, time for school, get prepared!"
"But mom, I'm too tired. I ate too much. I need to rest a little."
"Oh well, I give you 10 minutes." While Daniel landed himself on the sofa and grabbed a magazine, I cleaned the table and cleared the sink. James was playing with his Lego. Kitchen floor was decorated with crumbs, but I got no time to clean.
9:25 am.
"Your 10 minutes is up. Now get ready for school!" I was getting in Daniel's face. "OK." Lying on the floor, he showed no intention of getting up. Instead, a fight erupted between the siblings. Arms and legs tangled. Hands and toes flied toward each other. My order of "Stop! Stop fighting!" fell on deaf ears. The playful fight quickly elevated into military scale combat.
10:00 am.
I don't remember how the fight ended, but it did end and followed by much correcting and rebuking. I wonder if any of my words sank in and when the next volcano would erupt. My frustration was building up.
The first thing we do is Bible study, which is one of the two subjects (the other is Chinese) that the boys do together. We read and do quiz and worksheet together on the couch. Less than 5 minutes into Bible reading (I read aloud to them), James was hanging upside down from the couch and Daniel was leaning against me with his 86 lbs figure. I don't remember even once when the Bible lesson went smoothly. I glanced at the clock. "It's already 10:20, and we still have not finished the first subject."
10:30 am.
After Bible, James was off the hook and started his job as a Lego builder. Daniel groaned at his math practice, and then complained about his copywork (penmanship).
12:30 pm.
Can't remember what school work was accomplished besides math and copywork. One history reading maybe? I just remember that I had to be by my student's side almost all the time reminding and directing, otherwise he would just wander around or pick a fight again. So that explained that I had no time to prepare lunch. Because Guibo was working from home due to his broken leg, I was aiming at cooking at least one hot dish for lunch. But I was already exhausted, mentally and physically. Fortunately, hubby was understanding, so we had canned soup and Costco bread for lunch.
1:30 pm.
Our afternoons are usually less structured. My goal is to get school done in the morning and leave the afternoons for free reading and hobbies. Now I realize that my kids' hobby and their mission is to frustrate and torture their mom. Maybe I didn't cry this particular day, but I had cried (with tears) quite often in the frustration and sometimes anger too, "Lord, why is this SO hard?"
9:10 pm - 9:50 pm
Some days it took longer than 40 minutes to get them to bed. I should be thankful that they had stopped competing over who puts his feet to the basin first to wash. I felt like a hypocrite when kissing my kids goodnight and saying "I love you" because I didn't love them at that time. Hope that they didn't sense my insincerity from my tone or facial expression.
10: 00 pm - 12 am
Finally some much needed free time for me! Well, not really. I always have chores to do although it's hard to catch up with them. For a long time, I have struggled with setting my priorities right on time management (esp.the free time at night). Like a starving person in front of a feast (two hours is a feast!), I don't have the discipline and self control to choose the best dish or dishes. Simply following my appetite has often led me consuming more junk food (such as online shopping and reading for pleasure) than I want to admit.
Friday, June 29, 2012
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Nature Study: bird boxes, birds and their young
May 10th was Daniel's Nature Study group's last field trip--observing a handful of bird boxes along American River. Jerry, a retired Botany professor, volunteered his time and expertise to lead the group inspecting the bird boxed, which he had made and installed and maintained over the years. What a fun and educational trip!
We saw the following birds in their nests: tree swallow, wood duck, and barn owl.
In this bird boxes, six juvenile barn owls (I only saw five) hissing at each observer when we took turn peeking into the box.
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| Our young naturalists |
The kids got to inspect some unhatched wood duck eggs on the pebble beach. In three of the unhatched and abandoned eggs, we saw close-to-full-term ducklings. Doc (Jerry) explained why they were not hatched. Kind of sad that these duckling were so close to get out off the shell but did not make it.
All the bird boxes are high up on the tree trunks so Doc had us use the ladder he carried with him on our walk. On the first two climbs, James was a bit nervous and I had to go right after him, But he quickly became bold enough to climb by himself. Doc was holding the ladder with steady hands of course.
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| James was climbing the long ladder by himself. |
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| On the top of the ladder and peeking inside. |
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
What's your type?
Not able to download pictures to my computer recently was one of the reasons that I had neglected my blog . Here's an older post drafted several months ago.
One post from a Chinese blog site triggered my interest in Keirsey Temperament test. Being a firm believer of the value of people's individuality and uniqueness, I have never liked the idea of categorizing people into groups. However, reading about the four temperament types and taking several on-line tests convinced me of the usefulness, no matter how limited, of this kind of categorizing/sorting. In short, it may lead you to a better and clearer understanding of personality traits of yourself and of others, and hopefully could in turn improve communications between family members, friends, and co-workers.
The four broad temperament categories are combinations of two basic dimensions of human behavior: our communication (what we say) and our action (what we do).
These four temperament categories consist of 16 temperament types defined by four aspects as below and denoted by four letters:
1. Primarily Extroverted or Introverted
2. Primarily Sensing or iNtuitive
3. Primarily Thinking or Feeling
4. Primarily Judging or Perceiving
So, what's my type according to the tests? Either a Healer or Counselor type, and definitely an Idealist. I was a bit skeptical and a bit surprised at this. I know that I'm primarily an introvert, but mostly consider myself a practical gal. Or am I? Further reading of the more detailed description of these types was actually quite convincing to me.
The quotes below seem to ring true.
"Idealists (NFs), as a temperament, are passionately concerned with personal growth and development. Idealists strive to discover who they are and how they can become their best possible self -- always this quest for self-knowledge and self-improvement drives their imagination."
"The real, practical world is only a starting place for Idealists; they believe that life is filled with possibilities waiting to be realized, rich with meanings calling out to be understood. This idea of a mystical or spiritual dimension to life, the "not visible" or the "not yet" that can only be known through intuition or by a leap of faith, is far more important to Idealists than the world of material things."
"Healers present a calm and serene face to the world, and can seem shy, even distant around others. But inside they're anything but serene......"
But is self-knowledge possible? "As created beings, we can have no true self-knowledge apart from the knowledge of God. " Something I heard from a sermon a year or two ago. Profoundly true, isn't it?
One post from a Chinese blog site triggered my interest in Keirsey Temperament test. Being a firm believer of the value of people's individuality and uniqueness, I have never liked the idea of categorizing people into groups. However, reading about the four temperament types and taking several on-line tests convinced me of the usefulness, no matter how limited, of this kind of categorizing/sorting. In short, it may lead you to a better and clearer understanding of personality traits of yourself and of others, and hopefully could in turn improve communications between family members, friends, and co-workers.
The four broad temperament categories are combinations of two basic dimensions of human behavior: our communication (what we say) and our action (what we do).
| Actions | |||
| Utilitarian (do what works) | Cooperative (do what's right) | ||
| Communication | Concrete (talk about reality) | Artisans | Guardians |
| Abstract (talk about ideas) | Rationals | Idealists | |
These four temperament categories consist of 16 temperament types defined by four aspects as below and denoted by four letters:
1. Primarily Extroverted or Introverted
2. Primarily Sensing or iNtuitive
3. Primarily Thinking or Feeling
4. Primarily Judging or Perceiving
| Guardian | Artisan | Idealist | Rational |
| Supervisor (ESTJ) | Promoter (ESTP) | Teacher (ENFJ) | Fieldmarshal (ENTJ) |
| Inspector (ISTJ) | Crafter (ISTP) | Counselor (INFJ) | Mastermind (INTJ) |
| Provider (ESFJ) | Performer (ESFP) | Champion (ENFP) | Inventor (ENTP) |
| Protector (ISFJ) | Composer (ISFP) | Healer (INFP) | Architect (INTP) |
So, what's my type according to the tests? Either a Healer or Counselor type, and definitely an Idealist. I was a bit skeptical and a bit surprised at this. I know that I'm primarily an introvert, but mostly consider myself a practical gal. Or am I? Further reading of the more detailed description of these types was actually quite convincing to me.
The quotes below seem to ring true.
"Idealists (NFs), as a temperament, are passionately concerned with personal growth and development. Idealists strive to discover who they are and how they can become their best possible self -- always this quest for self-knowledge and self-improvement drives their imagination."
"The real, practical world is only a starting place for Idealists; they believe that life is filled with possibilities waiting to be realized, rich with meanings calling out to be understood. This idea of a mystical or spiritual dimension to life, the "not visible" or the "not yet" that can only be known through intuition or by a leap of faith, is far more important to Idealists than the world of material things."
"Healers present a calm and serene face to the world, and can seem shy, even distant around others. But inside they're anything but serene......"
But is self-knowledge possible? "As created beings, we can have no true self-knowledge apart from the knowledge of God. " Something I heard from a sermon a year or two ago. Profoundly true, isn't it?
Friday, April 6, 2012
One clumsy and incapable homemaker
Yes, that's me. Clumsy, incapable, inefficient, and disorganized. And sometimes frustrated too.
I can't escape the evidence. It is everywhere. Crowded kitchen drawers. Cluttered counter top and tables. Desks piled up with papers, books, and stuff. Disorganized bookshelves and closets. Floors and sofas invaded by toys. Not to mention the messy garage and backyard. It has been like that for a long time, but it is bothering me more than ever before. Maybe because now I am home with the children 24/7 so that home is not only a place that we gather after work and school. It is also the children's classroom, library, play room, battle field, and my office and break room.
Actually, I cannot think of anything that I'm good at about homemaking. I'm not a good cook, neither an efficient one. I cannot sew beyond sewing buttons. I cannot knit or crochet. I don't know much about crafts or interior decoration. I'm not good at gardening (just started doing a tiny bit of gardening this spring). Well, visits to friends' house have often confirmed my inferior feeling about my home management skills. Were I interviewed for a homemaker position, I would most likely be deemed as "disqualified" at the first round.
Maybe my mother was indeed right that I am no good at anything domestic. A Chinese proverb goes like this, "Skillful mothers, clumsy daughters." That was my mom and me. With nimble hands, mother had sewed most of my sister's and my clothes for our elementary years; she had knitted most of our sweaters; and she had made pillow cases embroidered with beautiful flowers and birds. My ineptness must have become so annoying to mother that she lost patience teaching me. The casual and not so casual comments my mother made toward my clumsiness made a long lasting impression on me.
I am not putting the blame on my mother for my utter lacking in the home management department. Before I got married, or rather, before I became a Christian, I actually looked down at those domestic skills. "Women hold up half the sky" ("妇女能顶半边天" ) was what I was taught at school. At home, although not exempted from chores, academic excellence was my parents' number one goal and expectation for me. A classmate (from high school or college) who probably didn't know me well had once commented that I would be a good future wife and mother. Guess what? I considered that an insult not a compliment--I was NOT going to be just a housewife! Freshmen year in college, finally freed from the heavy load of school works, most of the girls in my dorm were eagerly learning to knit or crochet scarfs or sweaters. I never tried. I even teased a good friend for spending several sleepless nights knitting a sweater for her boyfriend. Oh, how arrogant and foolish I was!
Considering my reaction to my classmate's comment years ago, it's humorous that being a good wife and mother has long become my desire. Not only that, "being a helpmate to one's husband and being an instructor to one's children" ("相夫教子" ), something that I used to despise, has become my career too. Then came the discrepancy between my desire and the reality of my weakness and lacking. What to do? One helpful interview tip advises the job seeker to honestly acknowledge one's lack of skills in certain areas if that's the case and in the mean time to emphasize one's willingness and ability to learn new things quickly. So, this clumsy and frustrated homemaker will have some on-the-job training (or rather self-training) to do, with sure willingness and unsure ability.
I can't escape the evidence. It is everywhere. Crowded kitchen drawers. Cluttered counter top and tables. Desks piled up with papers, books, and stuff. Disorganized bookshelves and closets. Floors and sofas invaded by toys. Not to mention the messy garage and backyard. It has been like that for a long time, but it is bothering me more than ever before. Maybe because now I am home with the children 24/7 so that home is not only a place that we gather after work and school. It is also the children's classroom, library, play room, battle field, and my office and break room.
Actually, I cannot think of anything that I'm good at about homemaking. I'm not a good cook, neither an efficient one. I cannot sew beyond sewing buttons. I cannot knit or crochet. I don't know much about crafts or interior decoration. I'm not good at gardening (just started doing a tiny bit of gardening this spring). Well, visits to friends' house have often confirmed my inferior feeling about my home management skills. Were I interviewed for a homemaker position, I would most likely be deemed as "disqualified" at the first round.
Maybe my mother was indeed right that I am no good at anything domestic. A Chinese proverb goes like this, "Skillful mothers, clumsy daughters." That was my mom and me. With nimble hands, mother had sewed most of my sister's and my clothes for our elementary years; she had knitted most of our sweaters; and she had made pillow cases embroidered with beautiful flowers and birds. My ineptness must have become so annoying to mother that she lost patience teaching me. The casual and not so casual comments my mother made toward my clumsiness made a long lasting impression on me.
I am not putting the blame on my mother for my utter lacking in the home management department. Before I got married, or rather, before I became a Christian, I actually looked down at those domestic skills. "Women hold up half the sky" ("妇女能顶半边天" ) was what I was taught at school. At home, although not exempted from chores, academic excellence was my parents' number one goal and expectation for me. A classmate (from high school or college) who probably didn't know me well had once commented that I would be a good future wife and mother. Guess what? I considered that an insult not a compliment--I was NOT going to be just a housewife! Freshmen year in college, finally freed from the heavy load of school works, most of the girls in my dorm were eagerly learning to knit or crochet scarfs or sweaters. I never tried. I even teased a good friend for spending several sleepless nights knitting a sweater for her boyfriend. Oh, how arrogant and foolish I was!
Considering my reaction to my classmate's comment years ago, it's humorous that being a good wife and mother has long become my desire. Not only that, "being a helpmate to one's husband and being an instructor to one's children" ("相夫教子" ), something that I used to despise, has become my career too. Then came the discrepancy between my desire and the reality of my weakness and lacking. What to do? One helpful interview tip advises the job seeker to honestly acknowledge one's lack of skills in certain areas if that's the case and in the mean time to emphasize one's willingness and ability to learn new things quickly. So, this clumsy and frustrated homemaker will have some on-the-job training (or rather self-training) to do, with sure willingness and unsure ability.
Monday, March 12, 2012
The Milgram Obedience Experiment and the Chinese Cultural Revolution
Several weeks ago at the Lighthouse Fellowship's Bible Study, the topic of why some Germans joined the Nazi Party and obeyed immoral orders during World War II was brought up. Although I cannot recall all that was talked about, we did have a lively discussion.
A week or two later, I came across an article talking about independent thinking, the Nuremberg Trials, and the Milgram Obedience Experiment. The experiment was very interesting but the results quite disturbing . I won't go into details of the Milgram Experiment, but would like to share a quote:
"Ordinary people, simply doing their jobs, and without any particular hostility on their part, can become agents in a terrible destructive process. Moreover, even when the destructive effects of their work become patently clear, and they are asked to carry out actions incompatible with fundamental standards of morality, relatively few people have the resources needed to resist authority." (Milgram, 1974)
This quote immediately brought the Cultural Revolution (文化大革命, 1966-1976) to my mind. Although I was merely a first grader when the Cultural Revolution ended, I have first heard from my parents and grandparents and then read from various authors (both fictions and non-fictions) about life during that time. I was intrigued early on (since middle school maybe) into the history of the decade of catastrophe.
Of the books and articles that I had read on the Cultural Revolution years ago, "一百个人的十年" (English translation: Ten Years Madness) was one that I still remember. It was non-fiction, a collection from interviews with 100 people who lived through that harrowing decade. Real life stories told by these people were truly more dramatic (and more distressing in this case) than fiction. Some questions had lingered in my mind after reading the book. Did people truly believe all the propaganda? What made them, even teenagers, treat their fellow countrymen so brutally when the latter had done no harm? What motivated people to betray their co-workers, neighbors, and even spouse and parents? Why there was no museum for the Cultural Revolution? Why there was very little reflection and repentance either on personal or national level? The questions can go and on.
It has been over 30 years since the end of the Cultural Revolution. Is what the author of Ten Year Madness feared most ("..that later generations will adopt a sensationalist attitude towards the suffering of an earlier one") becoming a reality in China? Do the younger generations know and learn from history? I don't know. I do try to keep up with news from my homeland but I only go back every 2 to 3 years now and usually only stay several weeks each time.
Well, what do I try to say through all this ramble? Maybe this. "That is the supreme value of history. The study of it is the best guarantee against repeating it." -John Buchan, Baron Tweedsmuir
As a student, I used to consider history a boring subject. Not my fault. Looking back, I realized that besides dry facts of names and dates most of which I could not recall, my history textbooks contained many plain lies. Fortunately, my children will have the freedom to learn history from many living books, preferably primary source document, including the Bible. In fact, Daniel loves reading history stories and I love learning along side with him. It is my hope that through learning from the past my children will gradually develop the habit of independent thinking and my own mind will be challenged and sharpened as well.
A week or two later, I came across an article talking about independent thinking, the Nuremberg Trials, and the Milgram Obedience Experiment. The experiment was very interesting but the results quite disturbing . I won't go into details of the Milgram Experiment, but would like to share a quote:
"Ordinary people, simply doing their jobs, and without any particular hostility on their part, can become agents in a terrible destructive process. Moreover, even when the destructive effects of their work become patently clear, and they are asked to carry out actions incompatible with fundamental standards of morality, relatively few people have the resources needed to resist authority." (Milgram, 1974)
This quote immediately brought the Cultural Revolution (文化大革命, 1966-1976) to my mind. Although I was merely a first grader when the Cultural Revolution ended, I have first heard from my parents and grandparents and then read from various authors (both fictions and non-fictions) about life during that time. I was intrigued early on (since middle school maybe) into the history of the decade of catastrophe.
Of the books and articles that I had read on the Cultural Revolution years ago, "一百个人的十年" (English translation: Ten Years Madness) was one that I still remember. It was non-fiction, a collection from interviews with 100 people who lived through that harrowing decade. Real life stories told by these people were truly more dramatic (and more distressing in this case) than fiction. Some questions had lingered in my mind after reading the book. Did people truly believe all the propaganda? What made them, even teenagers, treat their fellow countrymen so brutally when the latter had done no harm? What motivated people to betray their co-workers, neighbors, and even spouse and parents? Why there was no museum for the Cultural Revolution? Why there was very little reflection and repentance either on personal or national level? The questions can go and on.
It has been over 30 years since the end of the Cultural Revolution. Is what the author of Ten Year Madness feared most ("..that later generations will adopt a sensationalist attitude towards the suffering of an earlier one") becoming a reality in China? Do the younger generations know and learn from history? I don't know. I do try to keep up with news from my homeland but I only go back every 2 to 3 years now and usually only stay several weeks each time.
Well, what do I try to say through all this ramble? Maybe this. "That is the supreme value of history. The study of it is the best guarantee against repeating it." -John Buchan, Baron Tweedsmuir
As a student, I used to consider history a boring subject. Not my fault. Looking back, I realized that besides dry facts of names and dates most of which I could not recall, my history textbooks contained many plain lies. Fortunately, my children will have the freedom to learn history from many living books, preferably primary source document, including the Bible. In fact, Daniel loves reading history stories and I love learning along side with him. It is my hope that through learning from the past my children will gradually develop the habit of independent thinking and my own mind will be challenged and sharpened as well.
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